


Blue Was Memories

by SylviaoftheDepths



Series: Blue Is the Cost and Color of Happiness [2]
Category: Forever (TV), Person of Interest (TV), Timeless (TV 2016)
Genre: Families of Choice, Fish out of Water, Gen, IN SPACE!, Immortality, Repeated Deaths Do Not Engender Trust
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-25
Updated: 2019-07-25
Packaged: 2020-07-22 18:56:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,639
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19972006
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SylviaoftheDepths/pseuds/SylviaoftheDepths
Summary: Harold Finch makes a series of realizations in space and maybe the most important of them is the realization that loss can create space for others to enter his heart.





	Blue Was Memories

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know what I planned for this, but it certainly wasn't what this ended up turning out to be.

Nathan Ingram and Harold Wren’s funerals were held- on request- 6 months after the incident on the same day, at the same time, with the same exact dress code- blue.

The combined funeral was a private affair, everyone honoring the late Nathan Ingram’s love of the color blue on that rainy day by wearing it so dark it was nearly black.

Notable attendees were a man no one had ever seen before, John Reese, and Harold Finch. They all wore varying shades ranging from baby blue to sky blue, a beacon of color in the evening robbed of all light.

The last person was particularly noted with interest, for he looked exactly like the late Harold Wren. Half-brother, he’d told anyone who’d asked. They’d both inherited their mother’s looks. Although the late Harold’s hair was lighter, they noticed when they looked closer for differences. And the late Harold was as skinny as a stick. His half-brother, on the contrary had some meat on him. He looked a bit older than the late Harold as a matter of fact, so that made some sense. Plus, no one had ever seen the late Harold wear glasses, but clearly the half-brother had some eyesight issues.

The biggest, most noticeable difference was Harold Finch’s disabilities. Harold Wren could walk freely and had full use of his neck. Harold Finch couldn’t say the same.

Anyone with a more consistently functioning brain- like the Principal, Dr. Henry Morgan, and his Secretary, Lucas Wahl- took one look at Harold Finch, then glanced at John Reese, accepted what they clearly saw to be true, and moved on.

Regardless, the 3 visitors in the light blue attire were arguably the most emotional of the mourners.

Any good spy could tell by the lack of effort put into hiding their completely blank faces.

~

The day after the funeral, Harold Finch had headed straight for his Principal’s office, despite Reese’s quiet but harried protests and busted through the door completely uncharacteristically demanding a mission, lest he find one by himself.

The Principal had taken one look at his determined face and that of John Reese behind him and, with his signature amused expression, said, “Well, I suppose I should make you sit and recuperate, but in fact, I do indeed have a mission for you to take.” He waited for Harold’s expression to brighten before adding, “Provided you take John with you, of course.”

Harold’s expression had fallen instantly, but Reese’s turned somewhat hopeful. The Principal, however, would not be swayed no matter Harold’s protests, which had grown quieter and more characteristic of himself as they went on, eventually dying out entirely when no help had been offered by even Secretary Wahl.

And that was how Harold Finch found himself on a spaceship with John Reese, the boy Nathan Ingram had died trying to save.

~

That still didn’t explain how they got _here_.

Why Harold had woken up sobbing from dreams dominated by eyes made blue through the use of colored contacts, only to slowly begin to realize he was in someone’s arms and that someone was trying- and evidently failing, Harold could be stubborn when he wanted to, he only ever caved for Nathan and strange people like Dr. Morgan- to calm him down as quietly as possible as would be appropriate for night time aboard a spaceship.

As soon as he managed to reduce himself to pitiful sniffles, he’d shoved Reese from his bed and turned around and slept fitfully for the rest of the night.

In the morning, it was clear that the rest of the crew knew what had occured last night in the way they were all trying their utmost best to avoid his line of sight.

There was a female sigh from somewhere in the room as Harold sat down at the makeshift breakfast table, alone and trying not to seem awkward, and footsteps approached the table to introduce pancakes, scrambled eggs, and hot chocolate to his downturned eyes. He raised them to meet the sympathetic eyes of the fierce and beautiful woman he remembered as Jo Martinez.

“Eat up,” she said, completely devoid of any judgement, “you’ll need the energy.”

Harold had just enough energy at the moment to feel grateful to her in a way he knew would continue for an eternity.

~

That evening, he was walking to his and Reese’s joint- _joint_ , they had the nerve to put him in a room with the very person who had been the cause of Nathan’s _death_ \- room, only to see Reese himelf and a man he remembered to be Mike Hanson discussing something at the door. Whatever it was, it broke up instantly at the sight of him and Mr. Hanson offered him a tight smile as he made his escape from the situation.

Reese stared at him anxiously and Harold just huffed, brushing past him to stuff himself in his bed and occupy himself with the book he’d been reading before- well, before Nathan’s death.

That night he kept a light on all night to continue reading his book so he wouldn’t end up crying and causing a commotion at some unidentified time while everyone else was trying to sleep and regretted it heavily in the morning. Ms. Martinez took one look at him and minutes later passed him black coffee without a word.

He couldn’t feel more grateful.

Or so he thought until he walked back from breakfast only to see Mr. Hanson- looking like he wanted to be invisible- rushing from his room from around the corner and had immediately headed to the room only to see the uniform white of his bed had been replaced by a comforting blue.

He instantly knew what Reese and Mr. Hanson had been talking about the other day.

~

The next time Harold woke up crying and being comforted, he let Reese stay in his bed. The fit was cramped enough to make him notice that Reese dwarfed him.

He and Nathan had fit right into each other without trying.

The following morning, after Harold slipped out of Reese’s sleeping arms and headed over to the bathroom to brush and head out for breakfast, Molly Dawes stopped him in the hallway right outside his door and offered her ears to him if he ever wanted to talk about anything.

Harold thanked her with what he hoped she could see was the utmost sincerity he could offer.

~

It became clear to Harold that him and Reese being sent here was less of a mission and more of an appeasement for an unrealistic, grief-ridden demand. But the more time Harold spent around Jo Martinez, Mike Hanson, Molly Dawes, Lionel Fusco, the more he heard stories of a certain heroic Joss Carter who was chasing an immortal shadow back on Earth alongside a certain Dr. Morgan, and the more he found himself able to wish Reese a good morning or night, the less he found it mattering. There was something Harold found in this group of people, in every time Ms. Martinez looked at him with the eyes of a survivor, Mr. Hanson tried to go out of his way to do something good for him and Reese, only to freeze and stutter when confronted about it, Ms. Dawes sat beside him with a constant silent offer of conversation or comfort, and Mr. Fusco came to consult him on certain case leads that, for some reason, the rest of the crew trusted him with, something that eased the gaping of his heart alongside Reese's every hesitant effort to make accommodations for him, to apologize with actions and not words.

It wasn't what he had with Nathan, wasn't blue, but it was a lot like a rainbow, an amalgamation of colors that made Harold feel like he could have a home once again. Just, this time, in the stars.

~

In time, Harold and Reese had integrated into the space crew’s system enough to learn that there was indeed a mission on board. It was just not one they were privy to.

Yes, they were family, but some battles had to be fought on their own. Of all people, Harold could respect that.

Hence, Harold and Reese learned later, after everything had gone down on Earth, between one Joss Carter, Dr. Morgan, and the constant stream of video calls between them and the original crew of the spaceship, the existence of Adam, a man who had repeatedly faked his death enough times for the group to grow suspicious of him. Enough to realize that everytime he “died”, someone else from their group had died alongside him.

The snapping point- the death of the genteel James Carter, now ex-husband of Ms. Carter- had apparently caused the team to seek out their Principal, brother to an ex-crew member of theirs, and the combined efforts of the all-knowing Principal of a school of spies, a determined legal officer, and four sets of piercing eyes up in the stars had finally caught the long elusive shadow. (They also learned that their Principal was possibly actually immortal, but neither of them were particularly surprised by the news.)

The lost crew members memories were carved into the wall where the makeshift living room connected to the makeshift kitchen. They couldn’t be immortal, but the thought of them would be.

Joanna Reece

Zoe Morgan

James Carter

Joss Carter was currently taking care of getting him arrested. Dr. Morgan... Well, Harold was sure he would make sure Adam would regret ever messing with his family.

Harold resolved never to become like him and to keep the name Finch forevermore.

That night, as Reese held him, now out of habit rather than continued tears of suffering, he considered how Reese would never be blue, but indigo might be the closest Harold could get to the blue he’d lost.


End file.
